Sunday, January 6, 2019

Pig and farm report

this woke me up + hail + thunder + rain then the wind hit 61 mph and I thought a train was driving through the house but nary a flicker of the lights so I got up and made a pot of strong coffee and watched morning come in going to the beach to see how it all survived happy Epiphany 

Saturday, January 5, 2019

Pig and farm report

yesterday my beach was an unbelievable blue with whitecaps and mountains but the wind was at 50 mph all day though I only lost power once the wind gives me serious Mr Coffee Jitters the wind gets through my skin and whooshes around in my guts the wind are the trees screaming at one another it was also unseasonably warm I was going to bake bread but I was worried that the power would go out again and I'd lose my dough the wind stops me the way snow storms in Seattle used to stop me so I made the corporate decision to drive to the Dari Delite in Mount Vernon where I bought a strawberry milkshake with a plastic straw and a gigantor bag of French fries and a vat of tartar sauce the thing with the plastic straw and all the fuss about plastic straws is that the people who are noisiest about plastic straws are also the people who fly all over the place in airplanes talking about plastic straws which makes me want to talk about the dinosaur sized carbon footprint that airplanes the worst polluters you can imagine make but really I want to talk about my former company where I built those airplanes but not really and I only have one or two milkshakes a year and maybe one iced latte in summer I am not so much an abuser of plastic straws or of airplanes for that matter though I am guilty of having let fly so many of them for so many years

I woke up and read for a while this morning for a long time I forgot how to lose myself in books really lose myself the last book I got lost in was Lauren Groff's Florida which I read last summer on my deck in my mango swimsuit drinking up the sun like there was still an ozone layer and I was 12 years old with unblemished skin not 65 with skin so tender that Tide laundry detergent makes me break out in an all over body rash but now I am bookish again

the wind is down this morning I had coffee I read my book I read a beautiful haunting piece in the Paris Review by Sabrina Orah Mark  titled Ghost People: On Raising Boys and Pinocchio which holds among many startling and heart breaking insights the line "She smiles wide. One of her front teeth looks more alive than it should be." as soon as I read that I knew I was in for good she wrote about her son the shooting at the Tree of Life Synagog Pinocchio as golem boys and their imaginations and motherhood if you have a minute and care about children it is fantastic

I don't know what today holds I barely know the date these days the calendar I bought for myself is still in my closet and potatoes are sprouting in my garden below the tulips because it has been so warm I did manage to disappear almost all of Christmas the tree is undecorated and thrown into the forest where I will attack it with my little chainsaw once my knee lets me walk downhill the lights are put away and stacked neatly in my closet the Santas are gone all that's left is the Christmas tablecloth and I will get to that today because I have to mop my kitchen floor which is a sentence that probably only makes sense to me

Monday I have to take the kittens to the vet because Wolfie's head keeps clicking and it might be her microchip it is much too loud to be a tooth or it might be dried earwax though the click sounds mechanical to me as though she is an AI cat whose servomotor has come loose and Hal is going too because his ears smell rank though Jupiter does her best to keep them clean hopefully it will be easypeasy a drop of whatever to melt the gunk hopefully Wolfie will click for the vet so the vet doesn't recognize my crazy and hopefully it won't cost more than $40.00 that is my aim

I wish I had a plan for today other than drinking coffee reading attempting to bake bread working on my story watching the trees for the wind that is supposed to arrive yet again this afternoon and staying in my nightgown because who the fuck cares

good morning Darklings! it is one day or other of the week in January 2019 still a brand spanking new year and


Thursday, January 3, 2019

Pig and farm report

Wolf curled up for your viewing pleasure she's also sticking her tongue out at the wh the wind is up again maybe 40 mph right now and I am waiting for the power to flicker off I ate oatmeal with an apple in it for breakfast for sustenance since no power means no hot lunches whoosh whoosh and now I want to lie on the floor for a bit get taller the wind like this makes me feel my crazy grows a fully proofed dough in my stomach the place where my nerves meet to discuss news politics family finances and other urgencies yesterday I went shopping with my new budget and bought orange colored foods garnet yams squash and brown rice then I went to the marijuana store for my medicine since the Mr. Moxie mints are literally cheaper than Ativan and because DOGNURSE warned me that my insurance is going to decide which meds I need to be on also two days with Zombie Seroquel is about as much as I can stand and I am calmer but calm the way getting in a car accident makes you calm another word for shock another word for shook this morning I flipped off the wind and the trees an unkind act toward a forest I view as holy this may mean the crazy did not skedaddle with the  Seroquel maybe it is perching on the shaky limb of one of the ancient western hemlocks that live with me that are now my tree husbands and tree wives waiting to drop on my head as Prince Hal is fond of doing if he is above me and sometimes beside me just this morning he jumped on my bed and slapped me in the face with his giant paw which is now twice the size of Jupiter's paw but still connected to kitten

I am going to start my bookmobile tracking for 2019 I stopped listing the books I read last year because I read so many that it became a bother still I want to do it again I am currently reading Peter Straub's Koko which I rented at my library part of a trio of delicious books I have read before I also rented a movie called The Florida Project which is brilliant sooooo much better than Netflix's lame-o Bird Box seriously recommended a real story of resilient children and strong women about girls with kids living in the shadow slums underneath The Cult of Disney's stinking armpit a superb film I also discovered yesterday that my library has two different streaming services that show movies just like Netflix only free every time I go to the library now which is about once a week the librarian looks at me like she's the paranoid Secret Service I dreamed in the 1960s I secretly believe no one else on the island knows how to read including the librarian

I have my television on CNN with the sound off watching the democrats swear in to White Jesus God that they'll whatever good to see women and young people and people of color among all those fucking old white guys but not enough of them not nearly enough

my plan for today is to outwait the storm to trick it into submission to sit with a cat and read

have you written 2019 anywhere yet?


Tuesday, January 1, 2019

January 1, 2019

I like the beginnings of years it feels so clean last night was quiet I was here alone reading a book that is an old friend Peter Straub's Koko with the cats on my bed then under my bed once the gunfire started around 6 pm rifles and automatic weapons this morning I am cooking oats and an apple with cinnamon in my tiny slow cooker and making a couple loaves of French bread in between I'm watching the remarkable movie The Florida Project I have the propane fire off now as it will save me $100 a month and that is how I have to think I'm ready to shove the entirety of Christmas out the door but I need help reaching the top of the tree to remove decorations this is day two on Zombie Seroquel but as soon as I typed manic here the other day I knew it was true so I am taking care taking care 

I can't wait for my tulips to bloom

good morning Darklings may your new year be full of miracles and joy and blessings from the Animal Gods