Monday, September 13, 2021

Pig and farm report


My son sent me that photo yesterday of Chesaw in the fertile Okanogan Vally. He pulled over in his truck to watch a fire burning. I’m making a huge batch of cheese and onion and green pepper enchiladas and another batch without cheese for those vegans who might be here to freeze because I’m expecting to feed a houseful of people sometime here in the near future and I don’t want to be caught off guard. Chopping onions and stirring a roux and unsuccessfully fighting back a ripe and pungent panic. Here is a reprint of my enchilada recipe except because the garden is still overflowing I’m using fresh peppers. The thought of the giant surfer children gathering here breaks my bombed out heart wide open. Hello Darklings. The day is bright and beautiful but everything in the vast underneath is burning.

ps. In case anyone wants it and because I am always curious about recipes here is my easypeasy recipe for cheese enchiladas

Cheese Enchiladas a la Loudon
or, as we call it, dinner


Heat 1 tablespoon of butter in a heavy bottomed sauce pan
Add 1 tablespoon of all-purpose flour
This will become your roux the base for some of the world’s best sauces
Stir your roux constantly until it is light brown and has a nutty flavor it's a good idea to taste it to make sure the flour taste is cooked out but don't burn your tongue on it
While you are stirring sing this song repeatedly since it only has one verse and no chorus:

I want to make a roux for you
I want to make a roux for you
I want to make a roux for you
Now shut up and kiss me 

© Rebecca Loudon, 2005


Once your roux is cooked and you have sung the song several times
Add 1 large (28 ounce) can of red enchilada sauce any brand you want
This part is kind of cheaty but sometimes cheaty is ok and besides the roux absorbs the acky canned sauce taste
Add 2 cups of veggie broth
Toss in some salt to taste
Toss in some pepper to taste
Add 2 tablespoons of chopped cilantro unless you think cilantro tastes like soap

Bring your sauce to a boil
Reduce the heat and simmer for 30 to 45 minutes until it gets thick


Chop up a giant onion and sauté it in a skillet
Add a couple of those little cans of diced green chilies again this is cheaty but so what
Set the onions aside so they cool a bit
Shred up a ton of cheese
I like mozzarella or jack but sharp cheddar is good too


10 to 14 white corn tortillas
A blob of canola oil
Heat the canola oil in a small skillet over medium heat
Fry the tortillas until they soft NOT crisp about 30 seconds per side
Remove to a paper towel lined plate


Preheat oven to 350 degrees

The rest of it is pretty obvious but here goes
Pour ½ cup of the sauce in bottom of baking pan
Spread it out so your enchiladas don’t stick this works for lasagna too
Dip each tortilla into the sauce quickly (or they’ll fall apart) then remove to a work surface which for me is usually the pan I’m cooking the enchiladas in but if you have a marble counter by all means use it this part is messy
Spoon some cheese and some of the onion/chili mixture into the center of the tortilla saving some cheese to top the enchiladas at the end
Place it seam down in the baking pan
Repeat until your pan is full
Pour the remaining sauce over the enchiladas
Top with the rest of the cheese

Bake in a 350° oven for 20 minutes or until the cheese is bubbly or for an hour and a half if your oven is on the fritz and unreliable like mine
Sprinkle some more cilantro over the enchiladas before serving unless you think it tastes like soap

You can also add green onions and olives to the inside of the enchiladas if you want but it’s wrong
You CANNOT add meat to this recipe because I said so

Serve with a buttload of sour cream and some chacha salsa

Bon Appétit!

Sunday, September 12, 2021

Pig and farm report


It rained this morning after months of the constant drydry sky of dead lawns yellowing trees arid meadows and thirsty gardens I woke to the sound not a pitterpatter but a full on delicious deluge and the trees lifted up their hands and my yard drank its fill

I want to write about Sam about what the past few months were like as she struggled with her mental and physical health (her sailing in and out of dementia) and how my son cared for her with heartbreaking tenderness but when I think of putting words to it I can’t breathe so not yet not yet

It is quiet in my house today yesterday I baked a giant apple stuffed honey challah for no one in particular but because the creation of it kept my hands busy my mind occupied between bouts of weeping I’m still in bed this morning with both feral cats curled at my right and left sides looking at photos of New York fashion week and enjoying my solitude it’s the first time in weeks that I have been truly by myself here at Summer’s End where I just celebrated my five year houseaversary and I needed this quiet as much as the trees need rain

Why don’t you all join me here in this newly green place and we can break bread together and discuss our costumes for the Met Gala or gardens or art or god or tide tables or baking or perfume or books or sewing or animal hijinks or dahlias or sourdough starters or aging anything anything at all but politics 

Big Love from the seaside,


Thursday, September 9, 2021

Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt


My son sent the police to do a welfare check on his girlfriend of 17 years yesterday because he had not heard from her in a couple of days and he was worried worried. The police found her dead in her bed. We are fairly certain she had a heart attack and passed in her sleep. 

Children are not supposed to die.
Children are not supposed to die.
Children are not supposed to die.


Hearing my son howl in grief in his bedroom last night was the most terrible sound I have ever heard. It will haunt me my live long life but we are emotionally messy people. He is bereft and I am holding together to absorb what I can of his pain and grief. My son took this photo of Sam asleep in the backseat of his 57 Chevy.

Tomorrow Page heads to his father's to the orchard and the lake and then I can let myself fall apart to wail my own hurt. Think of us when you can and when you can.