Sunday, June 14, 2020

Pig and farm report

Tonight an eagle flew horizontally at eye level straight through my front yard my heart shivered with the wild beauty of it I ran out to the porch to what? see if I could track its passage? to hear if it left me a message about my dying country? a parcel?

I have been sick a pancreatitis flareup again but it was a short (though painful) bout just a week no doctor I felt today like I might be on the mend I don’t drink and I don’t smoke but I can lie very still on top of a hot water bottle and take ibuprofen I have 12 Vicodin but I’m saving them for the apocalypse or in case I fall down and break my arms off

I dreamed I was trying to play the clarinet in an orchestra and I couldn’t make my left hand close around the upper joint the conductor was the american president a panic dream and a music anxiety dream all rolled into one I woke up in a slick sheen of sweat probably my fever breaking

that eagle though shot through the green like jesus on a bender


Blogger Ms. Moon said...

I'm so sorry you've been sick! And these days the worry on top of the pain and illness. May you be better, the eagle an animal god announcing arriving health.

June 15, 2020 at 5:44 AM  
Blogger Radish King said...

Hi Mary. The stress is what brings it always yah. Staying inside the greeny green today with actual breakfast and an Ativan chaser. XO

June 15, 2020 at 11:58 AM  
Blogger 37paddington said...

Jesus on a bender. Love that. I hope you are feeling much better.

June 16, 2020 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

What a horrible nightmare! I used to play clarinet. I’m so sorry about the pancreatitis and the suffering it causes. Hope you’re feeling better every day. “Shot through the green like Jesus on a bender” is brilliant! Much love

June 17, 2020 at 4:29 PM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

I hope you are feeling better since you wrote this -- I am just catching up now. "Like Jesus on a bender" is such a rich phrase. It calls for a short story, a novel, a film and you the writer.

June 21, 2020 at 6:37 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

Thinking of you and hoping you’re better. Much love.

June 24, 2020 at 12:24 PM  
Blogger 37paddington said...

Just tipping in to say hey. I've been away. I see you have too. I hope you are doing ok. I love you.

June 26, 2020 at 2:58 PM  

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