Monday, June 19, 2017

Pig and farm report

last night at dusk I cut up three elderly honey crisp apples and threw them out my bedroom window and almost immediately the entire Animal Parade came marching through bunnies and birds happily chewing away I had no idea bunnies loved apples so much and no wonder those birds are such little fatties! joy and a floor show for Jupiter who sat on the window seat and banged her tail to let me know there was a criminal element in the side yard this morning brought the young buck and a doe to finish what the bunnies left which wasn't much I walked outside to pick dead leaves off my container herbs and as I picked a black leaf out of my cilantro I realized too late that it was a slug which made me run screaming into the house to boil my hand ick

I have baby tomatoes!!!

I have spread broken eggshells around my tomatoes hoping that will keep the slugs from wandering in I keep my eye on them so far so good have any of you gardeners out there tried this method?

after I tended the garden I took a bath washed my hair shaved my legs and opened an artery on the back of my left knee then I got out of the tub and wrapped my seafoam (not an actual color) hand towel around my leg to staunch the bleeding and plastered two giant band aids on it put on my dress and took myself to breakfast at the Farmer's Cafe which was as usual full of actual farmers then I went to the grocery store for garlic bread and then I went to the bakery to flirt with the baker and show off my bloody leg etc

when I got home I packed up the rest of the card boxes THE FINAL BOXES except for the fan box which Jupiter uses as her tent and took them to the dump I do love going to the dump it is the first fun memory I have of my father from back in the olden days when the dump was just a place outside of town where you dumped crap then set up beer bottles and shot at them with a rifle ahhh childhood with a drunk father can't be beat

after the dump I came home harvested two heads of red lettuce washed them in the sink started up Roberta the Robot walked out to talk to my trees startled a bunny actually almost tripped over her on my way down the hill did I mention I have baby tomatoes?!?! it seems like it's been forever since I had a garden and this one thrives

I am thriving too here happy healing myself from the inside out clearing my sweet insides of toxins and toxic people speaking of whom my ex-husband will be here for a minute next week which makes me nervous as it always has back in the good old days I used to cook Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners for him (I invited him for my son even though I detested cooking for him he who never thanked me for a single meal I cooked for him even down to packing his fucking lunches) until I admitted to myself and my kid that he was the most toxic of all and I was holding a lot of resentment toward him that I basically created myself it has been good for me to learn to say NO to realize that resentment hangs on because there is nothing one can do about it unlike guilt which can be assuaged sometimes though this time I will welcome him sort of and he can use the guest bathroom but no dinner not even a cup of coffee unless he begs for one but probably I will hide in my room he is going to a car show with the aforementioned kid I will mop the floor maybe and that's it

today is cleaning day as Mondays are now for me I never had cleaning days in the old house I only cleaned when I absolutely had to and it wasn't fun as it is here what with my robot vacuum cleaner and shiny new house

I think that's all there is to this post Orlando sleeps on the boy's bed Jupiter stalks the robot as she moves through the house then sits on the robot once it is done vacuuming she sits on it for a few minutes to see if it's still alive or if it is something she has to kill again she is a brave and proud hunter whether it is of wee mice or grown deer or those rather sweet old Seventh Day Adventists Mr and Mrs call me Lisa Kooper who stopped dropping by after I convinced them I was near death and really didn't want to read their little magazine about the Four Horsemen what with Satan in the White House etc

I feel so organized and unpacked that I could float like a bar of Ivory Soap™ if I wanted right out into the deep deep blue

Hello from Summer's End where even rotten apples taste sweet


Anonymous Anonymous said...

May all your apples be sweet.

June 19, 2017 at 1:27 PM  
Blogger Radish King said...

Barbara, I would plant an apple tree but my son is an orchardist and I'm already rather as in completely obsessed with Foggy Pudding and Marylinn Magnolia. If they survive next winter I will perhaps plant a Bing cherry tree. My son knows how to graft them hormones! Thank you my friend. The best kind of blessing 💓

June 19, 2017 at 2:13 PM  
Blogger 6279 said...

We have slugs and there's two ways to help deal with them that involve less frequent boiling of hands.... Buy some cheeep latex gloves and wear them whilst picking off Sluggers from your plants. The latex gloves go into the trash. And your fingers are free from being boiled againandagain.
The other option is very early morning slug stomping in already icked up boots or sneakers...
I use eggshells but they don't work but it's fun to crush eggshells so I use them anyways!

June 19, 2017 at 2:32 PM  
Blogger Radish King said...

Dear 6279 welcome to Summer's End! And yes I think gloves perhaps those heavily latexed gloves on the off chance the slugs are allergic would be preferable to the constant boiling of hands and the screaming of ICK that echoes into the forest. I shall look for a box. You know these slugs are the size of small ponies but much slimier than ponies therefore hard to saddle up. Thank you.

June 19, 2017 at 3:04 PM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

More stories, please. I love your writing so much --

June 19, 2017 at 8:34 PM  
Blogger Radish King said...

Elizabeth that means the world to me and there you are so close today and yet a world away. Did you have fog this morning?

June 20, 2017 at 11:52 AM  

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